Rainy Days…

I had an epiphany recently about my health and my health goals, one of those “ah hah!” moments where it really clicks in your mind and the connections are made. So enough bragging about my “ah hah!” moment, here is the “ah hah!”:

I have been working on saving my money so that when I make my move down South I will have some funds to fall back on until I start work again. Saving money for many is a difficult goal, with having bills to pay, debt to stave off, and more and more every day costs are rising. But after putting away the tiniest bit day by day or week by week or however you do it, eventually you have something that you know will tide you over. Funds that may be great or just good enough, but given enough time those funds will grow to the point where you will have more than enough to take care of yourself and your family.

Health is a lot like savings, our health is something that we have to work on. Instead of funds we give up time that we could use for television, making cupcakes (my personal temptation), or just sitting around doing nothing of real consequence. If we don’t take the time to get in a run or walk at least three times a week eventually our bodies will get to the point where when we have a “rainy day” when we get sick or an accident affects us we won’t have our health that we wish we had built up.

I have seen this first hand so many times and it is amazing to me that it has taken this long for me to make he connection and to now view my health as just as important as my savings account. My father is a diabetic and because of his illness, he gets sick much easier than my sisters and I. But the fact that he had let his weight get ahold of him, as well, made the issue even worse; he couldn’t rebound from being sick the same because his health wasn’t what it could have been.

I am one of those people who look at my MUCH thinner sisters and then look at myself and say I can never be healthy like them. Thin isn’t necessarily healthy, thin is a propaganda tool used by the media to make us think that we need to be something that isn’t always possible in the way we think. I know many women think that by being skinny we are healthier while still retaining our strength, muscle mass, or speed, but that is not true. Many times when people go through a diet where you lose weight but don’t work your body, you get to any even worse place.

This may sound silly, but if I were ever in a desperate situation I would rather be bigger than my sister but know that I am be stronger and faster than her, survival of the fittest in the long run is a reality.

One thing that I think many of us forget us that we look at our bodies and see in our mind’s eye the possibility of a thin model like body. I used to see my body that way, and then I found some high school pictures of my senior and junior year when I was at my best health and weight. Now I see that I can be that beautiful again the way I was, and I looked really great, not model great, but I was definitely at my best. I remember how I felt, how I looked at my body, and thought back to how that was the only time I had a “semi” flat belly and my backside wasn’t nearly a big as it is now. But this idea that I can look like a model isn’t realistic, I need to be happy with what and how I am and can be. My body won’t magically change its shape to fit my idea, my idea of my perfect body needs to change to fit my body at it’s “perfect” stage.

I was so blessed with a teacher in high school who really made an impact on my life with just one statement: Personal Perfection. I don’t need to be model thin, my body isn’t built that way, but I want to be healthy. I want to know that if I wanted or needed to I could run a mile without being completely winded. I want to know that I have finally achieved that goal of getting back down to 185 lbs and can keep myself there, but for now my main focus is just on getting to the point where I can run without pain, without being winded, knowing that I can push myself and expect my body to keep up.

My health is worth more to me than my savings because I have seen my father slow down in the prime of his life, and as a wanna be future mom I don’t want to have my health be a main concern while also dealing with raising children and running a house. I want it to be something that I can fall back on and continually add to like my savings.


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