These are my last two weeks in Oregon, my home and my life as I’ve known it for the past ten plus years, and I’m am not gonna lie…I’m freaking out. Don’t get me wrong, I am so excited to be moving down South to be closer to my “other family”, the Southern Guy and his relatives who have all, but adopted me right out, but being over 3,000 miles away from everything I know and am comfortable with. Things are SO different down there, it’s a whole other world with different ways of saying things, different ways of doing things, etc. It is a scary thing to leave my home that has been provided to me by my loving and gracious parents, to start paying for my own bills and my own belongings, all while not being able to go running back to mommy and daddy for comfort if it all falls down around me in tiny, ity bity bits.
But I am excited! I am excited, I am excited, excited, excited, excited! Truly I am, it’s just a matter of allowing my excitement to overcome my fears and worries.
Hopefully if I think it, say it, and write it enough times it will finally become the fore front of my thoughts rather than all the what could go wrong, all the “What If”s of life that I have no control over.
I have finally come to the realization that I have become a very type “A” personality, having to have things planned out down to the times and exact places on a specific day. Just ask the Southern Guy who has been so wonderful in putting up with it, to the point of saying it’s a characteristic of mine that he loves, that’s a great boyfriend right there. A guy who takes something that is most likely driving him crazy, yet he smiles and says it’s something to appreciate rather than to dislike. I am the most lucky woman to have him and his blind eye 🙂 !
Since I realized this I have instead of backing off of being so controlling, started to have to plan more things farther out. Things that aren’t in my control at all and so it has been driving me CRAZY! So the Southern Guy took me and talked me down from my cloud of craziness and after much coercing and prodding in the right direction I am back to my “normal” self. I have come back to the idea of being happy with what you have and what you know, being pleased knowing that you have done all you can to be all you are deep down. There are some things that we have to accept as being out of our hands no matter how hard it is to let go and focus on something more important in the “NOW”, if we don’t and we try to force everything that we want to happen, more likely than not it will force it’s way to not happen, then all that planning is down the tubes.
Someone once told me, “Decide who you want to be, before you figure out what you want to be.” Amazing advice that I have forgotten and I let the “WHO” become a wild mess while I tried to figure out what I wanted to be and where that was going to take me in life. The things that are important now are the things that will determine where I end up and what I end up being/doing.
On that note for the next two weeks I will be focusing on the Northern “farm” girl that I am, allowing myself to indulge in my families goats, the amazing bike rides, and my Northern family.
Speaking of which….
Our prize milker finally had her babies and all five are now three weeks old! Aren’t they adorable?! I love them all so much, but sadly when I come home to visit next at least three of these precious babies will be gone, sold to breeders, or worse sold as weed eaters. Please if you know anyone who is a breeder or looking to start their own herd, let me know on my Contact Page. We would love to see our little bucks sold as breeders, they are pure bred Nubians with a pedigree on both their dam and sire’s side.
Oh I will miss them and the North in general.